Closet Fix: August 2012   

Friday, August 31, 2012


TGIF! Since my monthly visitor had me feeling like a water buffalo, and retaining water like a desert camel, I couldn't imagine wearing any body hugging, skin tight anything this week. 
Of course there's a strong exception for tight tanks, low cut tops, and V-necks down to there, because the girls reach great heights during this time period, and I'm all about accentuating the positive, bordering on gratuitous displays of skin. 
Hell, don't judge me. I'm just embracing my curves, and let's just say, scoop neck tees, and anything sheer are perfect for putting my inflated funbags on display. 
 This inflation is more than welcomed, as my girls can alway be pumped up. However, my already bulging parts, certainly need no assistance.    
     But, clearly Mother Nature has a sick sense of humor, and thought it would be cute to waterlogg my already fat ass, or maybe she's all about symmetry and wanted equity on top and bottom. Either way, I'm not laughing, and dare I say she should get a life.  
Thank goodness for this drop waist dress that I paired with pumps which hides her handy work while accentuating the positive.
Enjoy your weekend! Make it count! Thanks for stopping by<3

Wednesday, August 29, 2012


Happy Hump Day! I'm having one of those everything that I put on looks like shit moments, brought to you by none other than Mother Nature and her monthly gift. 
It's bad enough that I have to deal with the feeling that my lady parts are being ripped from my body, all while fighting the simultaneous urge to devour a large piece of chocolate cake or vomit which ever happens to come first.
That's more than enough, but no gift would be complete without a little water retention making it damn near impossible to squeeze into, let alone fit into any of my clothes.
I mean, before I settled on this skirt and top combo, I actually went through so many other outfits, which btw, just the other day fit perfectly fine, but now since she showed up, and bestowed upon me the gift of bloat, the only thing that isn't swollen are my feet.
Which, obviously makes me want to ball up in the fetal position and cry, since it doesn't take much to illicit uncontrollable sobbing, as it's a part of the gift that keeps on giving.  
If I didn't have to venture beyond the confines of my house, I could deal, but since I do, every attempt will be made to steer clear of all reflective surfaces, and any commercials with kids or animals. Those get me every time.  
Enjoy your day! Thanks for stopping by<3

Friday, August 24, 2012


TGIF! Yesterday after stuffing my face, I decided to take Blog Pics, and ended up at a random church. The fact that I didn't combust into flames as soon as I stepped foot onto the grounds is a miracle in and of itself.
I mean, just look at what I was wearing. Denim cutoffs, paired with flats, and a stomach baring top. Sure it was appropriate for the weather, but for church, that's another story, which would've probably ended in some sort of public stoning had the congregation been around. 
At best, I'm pretty sure I would've gotten some soul piercing disapproving looks, along with a plethora of eye rolls from people like Mrs. So And So, who is likely the proud owner of assless chaps, which she only wears in the privacy of her own home. 
So, clearly she's better than me, who dared to expose myself in the House of the Lord, or at least steps away from it. Luckily, it was well after hours, and I was free to roam the grounds without judgement. 
Now, the eternal damnation that I may have incurred due to my infraction, may be impending, but I seriously doubt it. Sweet Baby Jesus sees me way more naked than I'm sure he would like to, and he has yet to rain down fire and brimstone on my head.  
Perhaps he's saving it for the grand finale, if you're picking up what I'm putting down, but I would like to think that he's not like that. You know, all wrath crazed and drunk on power. He's probably just happy that my heathen ass even made an appearance.
Have a kick ass weekend! Go Forth! Carpe Diem! 
Thanks for stopping by<3

Wednesday, August 22, 2012


Happy Hump Day! I'm taking a stand against Mother Nature. Don't be surprised if everyday going forward I'm showing an excessive amount of skin. Yeah, I'm going out in a blaze of glory, and by that I mean naked, in the motherfucking buff.
Summer is coming to a close, and I'm going to make sure I wear every single skin baring, ass revealing, gratuitous body part showing, outfit that I have before that cold ass Fall air takes over, and I'm stuck in layers, upon layers, of spirit killing, soul crushing, oh so depressing fabric.
I'm not going out like that. No regrets. These checkered shorts that I paired with a cami, and pumps, have been sitting in my closet since the beginning of Summer. As soon as I noticed that the days are starting to get shorter, and the air a bit cooler I reached for them.
If I don't wear it now, my fear is that by next year I would have ballooned beyond recognition, and these shorts would be more appropriate as a dust rag as opposed to something capable of covering my potentially overgrown ass.
They fit now. It's warm now. So, before I lose my opportunity to wear them while I still can, I may just live in shorts, or even a bathing suit despite my food baby. Hell, that little monster gotta tan too, and besides, I can use some color and as much vitamin D as possible.
Enjoy your day! Thanks for stopping by<3


I love incorporating color into my closet, but one of the easiest ways to get a Repeat Fix is to include neutrals as well. This sleeveless blazer seen here and here can be easily styled with many of my favorite pieces, because of the neutral color. White, black, beige, brown, and gray, are considered neutrals, which are compatible with a wide range of other colors. Because of the color, my white sleeveless blazer, provides me with so many Repeat Fix opportunities. Below are two different ways I wore the blazer.  
Featured on Closet Fix 
Sleeveless Blazer: Forever21 (similar one here) Vegan Leather Jacket: Forever21 (similar one here) Top: H&M (similar one here) Skinnies: Old Navy (similar one here) Bootie: UrbanOg (similar one here) Bag: Urban Expressions (similar one here)
Featured on FabSugar
Sleeveless Blazer: Forever21 (similar one here
Boyfriend Jeans: Forever21 (similar one here 
Tank Top: Forever21 (similar one here) 
Bag: Urban Expressions (similar one here)
Flats: H&M (similar one here)

Monday, August 20, 2012


Happy Monday! I'm still trying to get over my crazy weekend! I consider myself an avid drinker, and pretty much know when to quit before my insides are projected all over my shoes. 
I mean, that's just so, for lack of a better word, messy. Besides the whole falling all over myself, or some unfortunate stranger, in some all of a sudden inconveniently short article of clothing, just never did it for me. 
But, on Friday as I knocked back several drinks, I quickly regretted my entire life, as by the end of the night, I either developed a sick case of vertigo, or I just drank so much that my brain forgot how to signal to my legs to stand up straight.
I was messy! And, if I wasn't wearing these shorts, which I paired with a blouse and sandals, I'm pretty sure my vagine would've made an impromptu, albeit glorious appearance to anybody lucky enough to witness the flash of brilliance. 
Keeping my body parts under wraps was less of my concern as I was trying desperately to prevent the contents of my stomach from prematurely leaving my body.
Any normal, self respecting human being would've been embarrassed by the state affairs, but as I sat on the curb no longer capable of maintaining vertical heights, embarrassment was the least of my concern.  
 Using the last bit of my faculties, to spot my emergency ride who had to pick me up due to my condition, was way more important than worrying about the strangers who gawked at me as if I was giving head in the middle of Times Square, and I wasn't just another drunk ass chick sitting on a curb.
Enjoy your day! Thanks for stopping by<3 

Wednesday, August 15, 2012


Happy Hump Day! In this life, there's two times a woman should never wear white, and unless Mother Nature visited earlier than usual this month, I managed to avoid that bloody disaster.  
Unfortunately, I lost my mind, and against all rhyme and reason, I decided to wear white on the subway. Yeah...the same subway with the gonorrhea seats(see previous post), mystery odors that are very reminiscent of rotting flesh, and wet spots that one can only hope is just water.     
Even with knowing all that awaited me, I still wore the dress because of course in my mind, after scanning the millions of dresses in my closet,I had nothing to wear, and that one frock, out of all the dresses, was the only cute thing I had. The only one. 
Well, within less than a few minutes of boarding the train, I somehow managed to acquire a mystery stain right in the the front of my white dress, which clearly mortified me based on it's proximity to my who-who. I don't know what was in that substance, but I digress.
I was so panicked because I was on my way to a fashion event where I was quite sure a stained dress would not have been viewed as avant-garde.
But, as luck would have it, in Midtown, the streets are lined with so many clothing stores that as soon as I existed the subway I ran into the first store, headed straight for the sales rack, and selected this sequence dress and denim vest to replace my epic failure.
I proceeded to have my Clark Kent moment in the dressing room, and managed to show up to the event, skillfully rubbing shoulders with the likes of VH1's "Love & Hip Hop" star EmilyB as if nothing happened. 
Enjoy your day! Thanks for stopping by<3

Monday, August 13, 2012


Happy Monday! Over the weekend I went out and wore this short dress paired with a denim vest and pumps. I thought it was cute, but I immediately regretted it as soon my nearly bare ass cheeks came in contact with the petri dish that was my seat on the train.
The only thing separating me from whatever disgusting disease left behind by some outbreak monkey was the thin cotton layer of my Victoria's Secret. 
Fingers crossed Vickie's was built to combat biological warfare, because after all, it's NYC for heaven's sake. People here are walking around with all kinds of cooties, and my exposed backside was granting the little vermin easy access into my delicate immune system. 
At least in the cooler months this isn't an issue, because surely the gonorrhea left behind by the slutty chick previously occupying the seat wouldn't be able to penetrate the forcefield that is denim. 
However, this little lace number provided no such protection. So, if I go silent in a few days you'll know why.  
Enjoy your day! Thanks for stopping by<3